A call to action for anyone who’s ever thought about making a difference to a child in care.
The UK government recently launched a push to recruit 10,000 new foster carers. Minister Josh MacAlister described the policy changes as a “call to arms,” comparing it to the Homes for Ukraine scheme that saw over 100,000 people open their doors within 24 hours. The public stepped up then. Can we do the same for children in foster care?
Because the statistics are stark. The number of approved foster carers has fallen by almost 12% over the past decade, with the drop accelerating since the pandemic. Meanwhile, spending on residential care has doubled since 2020. But beyond the numbers are children who, as MacAlister put it, need “the lifelong, loving relationships” that the system is failing to provide.
The gap between intention and action
Since I heard this announcement, the lyrics from Tracy Chapman’s “If not now” have been repeating in my head. The song – both personal and political, love song and protest song – is about promises we make and never keep, waiting for the perfect moment until there’s no time left.
If not now, then when?
If not today, then why make your promises?
A love declared for days to come,
Is as good as none.
I’ve been a supported lodgings carer for teenagers leaving foster care for three years, and my partner and I have promised many times we will become ‘proper’ foster carers. It’s something we see as part of our future, but…not now, not just yet.
What I know from working in children’s social care research is that there are thousands of people out there who’ve also thought about fostering. People who’ve seen an advert on a bus shelter and felt something stir. Those who’ve wondered, late at night, whether they could do it. And – like me – they tell themselves: not now, but… when our youngest goes to uni, when everything is more manageable at work, when we’ve got the spare room back, when – all in all – life is a bit less hectic. It feels sensible, responsible even: waiting until you can give it your full attention.
But the uncomfortable truth is that for most of us, that moment never comes. The kids leave home and suddenly there’s the grandchildren to help with, or ageing parents who need you, or that trip you’ve been putting off for years. The “when” keeps shifting. A decade passes. And by then, the children who needed a safe, loving home and people invested in them and their futures – they are adults themselves now. And many of them are dealing with all manner of difficulties that trace right back to what happened to them all those years ago.
So what if we didn’t wait? What if you did something now, even something small, to see what’s possible? What if there were ways to dip a toe in, to test yourself, to contribute, while your life is full and busy and imperfect?
Starting where you are
1. Volunteer with care-experienced young people
Many charities and local organisations run projects with children in care or care leavers. This might involve mentoring for care leavers, activity clubs, short term befriending services or advocacy groups. Donate to the annual Christmas dinner for care leavers in Cardiff or find one local to you to support with your time. Organisations like Become, NYAS and Action for Children also often need volunteers. This kind of involvement helps you understand the care system, build relevant experience, and (most importantly) make a difference while you’re working out your next steps.
2. Become an Independent Visitor
One of the best-kept secrets in children’s services, Independent Visitors are volunteers matched with children to be a consistent, supportive adult. You might meet once or twice a month to go to the cinema, kick a football around, or grab a pizza. You’re not a social worker. You’re not trying to fix anything. You’re simply showing up, consistently, for a young person who may have had too many adults disappear from their life.
The commitment is typically a few hours a month for at least two years. It’s not nothing, but it’s manageable alongside work and family life. And the evidence tells us these relationships genuinely matter. Contact your local authority’s children’s services or search for Independent Visitor schemes in your area.
3. Explore weekend or short-break fostering
The government’s new plan includes pilots for part-time fostering arrangements. This recognises what many people have always felt: full-time fostering is a huge commitment, but that doesn’t mean smaller contributions aren’t valuable. Weekend, short-break or “stay over” foster carers provide crucial support by giving full-time carers time to themselves while offering children positive experiences with caring adults. Ask your local authority about these options, and check out Weekenders which matches young people in care with Weekend foster carers to build lifelong supportive relationships through fun weekends spent together.
Beyond short breaks, fostering comes in many other forms we don’t immediately think of: providing somewhere safe for a night or two in an emergency, supporting young mums to care for their babies, supporting young people who’ve been involved in the criminal justice system, caring for children who are preparing to go back to their parents, as well as for those who that’s likely not an option for.
4. Consider supported lodgings
If you have a spare room and could offer a home to a young person aged 16–25 who’s leaving care or at risk of homelessness, supported lodgings might be for you. It’s less intensive than fostering younger children: you’re providing a stable base and guidance as they learn to live independently, not round-the-clock care. All providers offer training and ongoing support. We’ve had four young people live with us during the last 3 years, some just for a week or so whilst their main carer was away, some for much longer.
Next steps
Since I started writing this, we’ve put our application in. I’m not fully ready, but supported lodgings has shown me that it’s impossible to prepare for every eventuality. Almost everyone who fosters says the same thing: they thought they weren’t ready, weren’t experienced enough, weren’t the “type”.
The new regional fostering hubs aim to challenge these “outdated” ideas about who can foster: you don’t need to be married, a homeowner, or be willing to give up work. But you also don’t need to live like a saint, or want to be a parent in the typical sense, or be in a relationship, or always have a tidy house. People who foster aren’t people with perfect lives and empty diaries. They’re working people, parents with kids still at home, people juggling everything. Every local authority has a fostering team, and they’re not just looking for people who are ready to start tomorrow. They’re happy to have exploratory conversations, send you information, and keep you on their radar.
You probably won’t apply to foster today. But there are small steps that might make it feel a little bit more possible, and that would allow you to make a difference today. Any of these could be your first step.
If not now, then when?
– Rebecca Jones